Sunday, February 27, 2011

There Goes My Life Teaser

So I feel i must apologize for the lack of posting here and as far as chapters go. RL has gone from ok to hell and back.

Here's your teaser.  Feel free to leave me thoughts.

My relationship with Edward was rebuilding...slowly. I think he wanted me to go faster, but I wasn't ready for it. I wanted, no needed, to get to know him again. The Edward I used to know was not the same Edward that I knew now. After we were done spending time at the hospital, we usually went back to the hotel that our parents had gotten for us. I would usually upload any pictures to the CaringBridge site that Alice had created for our twins, as well as post a little update on them. Sometimes Edward and I would go grab dinner and talk. Those were the days I really liked being with him. Our conversation would be light and easy, and I felt comfortable with him.

Other times, however, Edward would say something that would upset me, and I would pull away from him, or shut myself in my room for the night. Maybe it was juvenile of me to do that, but I hated when he did this. I hated that he wanted me to forget everything that happened and take him back with open arms. I couldn't do that. I needed to start doing what was best for me and the twins. Sometimes I wondered if being with Edward would just make things easier. But then I wonder if I would be happy if I were to just give in. At one point, this was all I wanted – to be loved by Edward and have a family with him. But the more I thought about it, I knew going back to him now, with this much hurt and betrayal between us, would be a mistake. I would be miserable, and even though I'd be with him, it wasn't good enough for me anymore. I deserved to be with someone who loved me and made me happy.